Five Minutes of Non-Doing

Do you find this time to be sacred or dreaded?

The five minutes of “happy time” begin … Photo by author.

“A happy life must be to a great extent a quiet life, for it is only in an atmosphere of quiet that true joy dare live.” — Bertrand Russell

My friend Sue always has perfect-looking nails. When we have dinner plans, I sometimes have to sit on my chipped nail-polished hands to avoid her wrath. I do love the way manicured nails look, but I don’t always love spending the time to get them professionally done. Sitting there for 25 or 30 minutes is challenging enough for me. Then, the five-minute dry time almost does me in every time.

Today, I finally went to get my nails done. In the middle of the appointment, the manicurist came around and gave me a two-minute shoulder rub. I could feel my knots crunching under her knuckles. I took a deep breath, a long exhale and enjoyed these moments. Then, when she was done with the polish, she flipped the timer and told me to sit for five minutes.

It’s Happy Time

As I watched the sand slowly slip through the glass, I chuckled to myself. The sand glass timer was labeled as “happy time,” and I wondered how many clients truly considered this wait time as joyous. I imagined people thinking about the items they need to get at the grocery store … about the child they have to get soon at camp … about the wet laundry that awaits in the machine at home … about what they were going to cook for dinner … about the work project they need to finish later that afternoon.

I think, like me, a lot of people often feel antsy. The awareness of all that has to be done often overrides the feeling of quiet pleasure. It trumps this idea of relaxing. Here I am, doing something I am privileged to be able to do, and I just want to get out of there. It’s a bit ironic.

Why don’t we embrace these inactive moments? Why don’t we revel in the motionlessness? Why don’t we free our minds from thoughts of our next activity?

An Atmosphere of Quiet

I talk a lot about enjoying the moments. They are precious. They are fleeting. They are unpredictable. But, sometimes, they just are what they are — simple. They are minutes we are in a carpool line. They are time we are waiting to see a doctor. They are bad-music-filled phone minutes on hold with the utility company. They are moments when there is nothing to do.

In the Bertrand Russell quote I shared above, he suggests true joy is found amongst the quiet. Those times when we have nothing to do. Those moments that we must just sit. The quiet that allows creativity and memories to flood our minds … those are the moments that flock before us. What do we do with them?

We can choose to view the quiet as a gift — a gift of stillness … an opportunity to be mindful … a possibility for joy. These drying moments at the manicurist are simply a metaphor to how we live our lives.

How do you fill seemingly empty time? How aware are you during the still moments? Do you allow the motionless minutes to carry you toward peace or do they send your mind into a tailspin?

Please Refrain From Cell Phone Use

Many nail salons have signs requesting that patrons stay off of their phones so that all guests can relax. This in itself is uncomfortable for many. But, it’s precisely that unsettling feeling that should be the wake-up call for us. We need to see that 30 minutes away from our phones is distressing, and we have to be aware of that outrageous premise.

We were okay decades ago, when we didn’t carry pocket-size computers in our purses. We were okay not being able to track our children’s whereabouts. We were okay not being able to text our partners. We were okay embracing non-motion moments.

So, today, the words on that sand timer were a great reminder: Pay attention. Look around. Close your eyes. Unplug. Embrace opportunities to be quiet and aware.

When your phone dies, don’t panic. When you can’t be physically connected to anyone, don’t feel alone. When you’re left on hold for an uneasy amount of time, don’t get agitated. Instead, just be as you watch the sand fall through your happy timer with full child-like abandon.

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“But I’ll tell you what hermits realize. If you go off into a far, far forest and get very quiet, you’ll come to understand that you’re connected with everything.” — Alan Watts